For those that know me, know that my first love (before moving down to Englandshire and having Arran) was trekking in the mountains. My spiritual place is deep in the Himalayas and deep to my heart.
That part of me was tucked away into a wee corner, when I became a mummy again. it seemed like overnight from an adventurer, hiker and lover of mountains I became boring and unworthy. I had lost the freedom to just roam the mountains and I guess this was one of the biggest contributors to my post natal depression. whilst living in Scotland, whenever I would feel down, I would head to the mountains and after a good 10hr hike, I felt on top of the world.
I LOVE mountains, I love being in them, I love reading about them and I love watching programmes about them - especially anything to do with Nepal and the Himalayas. its a place where I had my first huge spiritual awakening, as I stood at the foot of Annapurna. a place which touched me somewhere so deep, that even to this day I have no idea what actually happened.
Having done Kilimanjaro, Everest base camp, Annapurna sanctuary, the andes in peru, mount toubkal in morocco and many of the Scottish mountains, its where I felt alive.
But that all vanished. I became just "mummy" and as much as I love my wee boy, that was very hard to come to terms with. I was MORE than just "mummy". I knew it, as I had been so much more - so I just became mummy and began to hate who I was. It was given a name - "post natal depression". I called it being trapped and losing my independence.
Recently, however, the mountains have been calling me again and I cannot ignore that call - my soul screaming to meet me in the place where we first bonded - nepal .
I am hoping that next year will be the year that I fulfil a long held dream of reaching 6000m. I have got to 5895m so far. Am not the same level of fitness as I was then - lots of binge eating, little exercise and hiding away has not helped!
So, guess what I have done?
I have just gone and booked a trek to Nepal on the 12th October 2020, to summit my first 6000m peak (actually its 6,476m (21,246ft) - size REALLY does matter! I am going with KE Adventures, with whom I have trekked before.
Its going to be an intense year of getting myself to a level where I can summit this peak in October 2020.
I have started this blog (by request of my PT - more on her later) as a record of my journey tot he summit.
Its time to be Yas again and not just "mummy", because by being me I can show others, that being a mummy does not mean who you are has to cease being.
Wish me luck & please feel free to join me on an adventure!